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67 CYNIC · POP CULTURE, AGGREGATED. JUDGED. MOVED ON. EST. 2026 · WEB 2.0 READY

The Reel...

Biles Dropped The Burglary Mid-Makeup

via The recap: TMZ · The local version: NBC Chicago · The wire report: USA Today · The recovery detail: Today

Olympic gymnast Simone Biles revealed on a get-ready-with-me TikTok that three masked men broke into the Chicago home she shared with husband Jonathan Owens and stole her Porsche GTS, per TMZ, and the car has since been recovered. The burglary is not the news.…

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Madonna Is The Merch Now

via The recap: Hello! Magazine · The official store: shop.madonna.com · The 10th No. 1 chart run: Billboard · The Rolling Stone version: Rolling Stone

Madonna, 68, posted behind-the-scenes photos from a shoot for her new Confessions II merch line to Instagram this week, posing in a sheer black top, fishnets and a cascade of layered necklaces while peeking over a doorframe. Photos courtesy of Hello! Magazine.…

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Patient Zero Is The Marketing Virus

via The recap: E! News · The announcement: Billboard · The dark-website countdown: USA Today · The wire copy: The Washington Post

Taylor Swift announced Tuesday that a new single, "Patient Zero," drops September 25 with a 24-hour pre-order window on her website, per E! News, capping a run of coded clues that started with a cryptic Emmys sketch and a letter on her site that sprouted a thi…

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The Walking Franchise Beat A 2012 Record

via The recap: Deadline · The 2012 record it beat: Box Office Mojo · The 2012 opening report: TheWrap · The numbers: The Numbers

Zach Cregger's Resident Evil reboot opened to $60.1 million from 3,684 theaters and $108.3 million worldwide last weekend, per Deadline. That worldwide number is being billed as the biggest opening in the 24-year-old franchise's history. Box office PR runs on …

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Digger's Premiere Got A Royal Seal

via The recap: Daily Mail · The BBC version: BBC · The trade version: Variety · The great-jacket detail: The Independent

Prince William and Princess Kate attended Tuesday night's world premiere of Tom Cruise's satirical black comedy Digger at the Odeon Luxe in Leicester Square, a Royal Film Performance held in aid of the Film and TV Charity, where Cruise guided the Princess down…

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The Most Exclusive Room In Milan Is A Group Hug

via The recap: Variety · The actual red carpet gallery: British Vogue · The live arrivals feed: Vogue · The best-dressed list: Vogue

Per Variety, Vogue World Milan held its annual fashion show on Tuesday, with an invitation-only red carpet that included Michael B. Jordan, Dakota Johnson, Dua Lipa, and Irina Shayk. The show, themed around Italian craftsmanship in the age of artificial intell…

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Kenneth Cole's $75 Bottle Of The Word Inspire

via The recap: PR Newswire · The brand page: Kenneth Cole · The industry coverage: WWD · The FashionNetwork version: FashionNetwork

Per PR Newswire, Kenneth Cole has launched INSPIRE, a new men's fragrance named after the verb, fronted by Joe Jonas, who also performs its original power ballad. The rollout includes a One Times Square takeover, branded pedicabs, and a $15 body spray. The $75…

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Why Not A Bunch Of Kendalls

via The recap: Marketing Dive · The creative breakdown: Adweek · The Hollywood Reporter version: The Hollywood Reporter

According to Marketing Dive, Beats launched a new ad for its customizable Beats 360 headphones in which a cafe is packed with different versions of Kendall Jenner. The cafe in the ad is, of course, called Kendalls. The genius of the Franchise of One is that th…

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Kim's Rebirth Is A Photoshoot

via The recap: Hello! · The photo gallery: OK Magazine · The second gallery: Entertainment Now · The parrot detail: Mid-Day

According to Hello!, Kim Kardashian posted a nude photoshoot with photographer Donna Trope on September 22: her silhouette draped in pink orchids and garden roses, two pink parakeets perched on her shoulders, captioned "Lost Donna Trope files." The press is al…

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